Thursday, December 07, 2006

Make plans and God laughs

Lauren, December 2003

I thought I was going to write a cute little post about baby Lauren today. I had selected this adorable picture. Oh, the plaid dress! Ohh! The itty bitty maryjanes!

Sometimes you make plans, God chuckles, and you have one of those sneaky little epiphanies. I don't have any other pictures from this Christmas. We were pretty sure this was going to be Dad's last Christmas Eve, spent in the guest bedroom at Gramma Jean's. We mixed drinks, smoked cigarettes, and joked and laughed like we always do, of course, but it was overshadowed by the idea that this was our last Christmas. Three years later with Dad doing fine I didn't expect that to hit me like a ton of bricks.

I have plenty of friends who've gone through their lives with dad-sized holes in them because their fathers either weren't around or simply weren't present. There's not a lot between us that's left unsaid, I would just really miss him.

I love you, Dad.


Dad said...

Hi Heath-
Just being your grandmother's guestoom freaks me out still. All my thoughts facing my mortality always rush back and overwhelm me. I remember thinking that if (or I really thought when) I pass U am glad I had one last night with my kids and grandaughter.

It is nice that God chuckled and let me stick around. I love you too...

Kicking N. Screaming said...

I sent this to my friend Paige, because she does have a dad-sized hole in her life and I knew she'd appreciate that you're being actively grateful. She's JUST started her own brand new blog. You should check her out -
I'm sure you'll approve of her template.