Friday, July 13, 2007

Nobody told me there'd be days like these

[Scene: Farmer's Market. Several tables are piled high with local produce, wildflowers, freshly baked breads and pies. A pickle stand is surrounded by barrels.

EPIPHANY enters, pushing a stroller with LINDSAY within. A diaper bag is slung over the rungs of the stroller which is flanked by LAUREN on one side.

As she eases her way toward the the tables with her purchases, EPIPHANY'S load grows heavy. As she approaches the pickle stand to speak with the proprietor, a YOUNG BOY comes around the back of the stroller, at the very moment LINDSAY stands up. The stroller crashes back, leaving YOUNG BOY looking surprised.]

: Mom, can I have a pickle?
YOUNG BOY'S MOM: What did you do, Jeffrey?! Oh my God. Didn't you see there's a baby in there?!
EPIPHANY[tiredly]: It really wasn't his fault, ma'am. The groceries are too heavy for the stroller. And the baby is just fine...
LAUREN: Mom, can I have a pickle?
YOUNG BOY'S MOM: You'd better say you're sorry, Jeff.
EPIPHANY: He did say he was sorry. But it really wasn't his fault. The groceries were too heavy.
LAUREN: Mom, can I have a pickle?
PASSERBY: You know what the problem is? You have too many bags on the back of the stroller.
EPIPHANY: Oh, thank you.
LAUREN: Mom, can I have a pickle?
PICKLE VENDOR: That's 11 dollars.
PASSERBY: You really should fix the stroller so it doesn't fall down again...
LAUREN: Mom, can I have a pickle?



Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

Ouch. Fade to black. Tell the munchins I miss them..

karen said...

Tune next time to find out just how sick Lauren was, after eating five pickles!

Anonymous said...

Now that's what I call "grace under pressure"!

The Plaid Sheep said...

Where was the cosmic director to say cut before the fall? He should be fired. Slacker.